Academy Award Apocalypse

During the recent Oscar telecast, I posted on Facebook three words I never thought I'd connect with the Oscars - I was bored. That's right - I said it. It was boring. From the films themselves to the winners to the speeches, right down to the "best" song performances, it was boring. I acutally turned off the television not long after they announced yet ANOTHER award for "The King's Speech" (but before the unnecessary choir).

I love Annie Hathaway to death, and in my opinion she can usually do no wrong, but this wasn't exactly the best gig for her. She did quite well with her musical number and she looked lovely in (almost) all her many ensembles, but having two non-comedic actors hosting the Oscars simply isn't a good idea. But Annie was fantastic compared to the wooden and hopelessly out of place James Franco.

The show was disjointed - showing montages that were irrelevant, and adding references that were stupid. And what WAS that Harry Potter/Twilight thing supposed to be?

But it wasn't all bad. It was great to watch Colin Firth give his acceptance speech. (Now, if Julianne Moore would give one that'd be fantastic!) Natalie Portman looked beautiful and was humbled, gracious and articulate - Mike Huckabee's comments be damned.

Some Oscar Rules remain firmly intact:
1. Portraying an English monarch will get you a nod, or possibly a win (unless you're Emily Blunt).
2. If your film has Nazi references, you'll get a Best Picture nod (unless it's Indiana Jones).
3. If it's a Pixar film, it's guaranteed Best Picture, Best Animated Film and Best Original Song nods. It will win two out of three.
4. If you are nominated in one year for a career defining film and lose, your next film will get you a win (unless you're Christopher Nolan).

Finally, the most important one - if your film is full of pompous, self-important people, and your film is outdated and irrelevant but is Uplifting with an Inspirational Message, you will win. Originality is not needed or encouraged.

Honestly, how many more films like "The King's Speech" need to be lauded? This film won't be remembered in ten years - hell, it won't be remembered in two. I thought the Oscars were supposed to be about defining a film that was different - that stood out. There wasn't a thing that stood out for me in this film - that ground has more tread on it than my new Goodyear tire.

During the Oscars, I was reading Entertainment Weekly. One of the featured articles was called "10 Ways to Fix Movies". I hope someone figures something out - and soon, because this past year was weak all the way around. And apparently I'm not alone in my viewpoint.