My "Paranormal" Experience

I finally gave in to the hype and saw “Paranormal Activity” earlier this week. My expectations going in were low. I was hoping against all hope I’d be scared at some point, or perhaps semi-freaked out. I thought maybe going at 5:05 in the evening meant the crowd would be absent. I knew I wouldn’t have nightmares that night – I’m a horror vet. I’ve seen foreign horror that freaked me so bad I couldn’t even look at the screen, and I’ve seen horror that made me nauseous.

So, what did I think?

I think maybe this film needs to marinate. It’s not a film that ends when you leave the theater. That’s the joy in effective horror – you’re creeped out more once you rejoin the outside world. A theater, after all, is a controlled environment. You can always look away or cover your eyes momentarily. Other people are there – people to feed off of (zombie pun unintentional). That’s why you’re supposed to see this in a theater. Thankfully my audience was just my friend and myself. Did we talk through it? Yup – which made it fun (plus we had better dialogue than the leads did).

While the film was running, I actually got bored. The film is repetitive. The acting is flat. I found both of the leads annoying, and I wouldn’t have stayed with either of them longer than ten minutes. I figured out the ending 20 minutes into the film. A few things were interesting, and I got my one jump. The ending was quite stupid and obvious from a mile away. As I got into my car, I called a friend, starting the conversation with “If anyone thinks this is the scariest movie EVER, I can think of fifteen others they need to see - off the top of my head”. I raved a bit about the blatant “Blair Witch” rip-off (expected) and “The Ring” (unexpected). I stated that the “realistic farce” stating “whereabouts unknown” is just dumb. I know exactly where these people are –on the front my EW I received last Friday!

But then I went back home to my new apartment. Living in an apartment means there is always constant noise coming from somewhere – and you know not where. I’m still getting used to that, as I like to have quiet when I sleep – dead quiet (pun intended that time). Since it was an early film, I had plenty of time to watch other things before retiring for the evening. I ate dinner, watched TV, read “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies”, and eventually got tired.

But here’s the rub - I slept with the light dimly lit all night. And I have no idea why.

But back to “what did I think”. Basically, I think it’s nowhere near the scariest movie ever made, but I do concede that the film works. The film in an inarguable success – I just think it succeeds much better outside of the theater.

"Paranormal Activity" - Rated R, 86 minutes **1/2